3 Attitudes to Embrace Change

Maybe you’ve heard the expression, “The only constant in change.” Sometimes, life feels that way, doesn’t it? Even when the change is positive, it can still cause our stomachs to somersault.

In less than a month, I went from single to married and enrolled as a student for a summer class while juggling a full-time job. Exciting? For sure! Nerve-wracking? Maybe a little.

Along the way, I realized my attitudes determine whether I enjoy the change or let it cause undo stress in my life. Maybe these takeaways are simplistic, but I hope they’ll help you if you’re facing changes.

#1: Welcome the Newness

Usually, a few moments after my head hits my pillow, I’m out cold. I tell my now-husband not to worry about waking me when he leaves for work, because I can basically sleep through anything.

However, the night before my wedding, I couldn’t sleep. I may have managed 3-4 hours, and that’s a generous estimate.

There’s something about newness, uncertainty, and the unknown that unnerves us. At two in the morning on my wedding day, I realized I had two choices: embrace the newness, even if it’s awkward, or over-think it and make it even more awkward. I chose to laugh at my clumsy moments in the first few weeks of marriage and reminded myself that I will only be newly-married once. Why not relish the newness instead of cringe at it?

That’s what I decided to do, and as a result, I absolutely enjoyed those moments. Looking back on those first few weeks brings a smile to my lips and no regrets.

#2: Savor the Season

Here’s the other thing about change. It doesn’t last forever. The wedding day comes and goes. The honeymoon ends. The first day of class becomes a daily routine.

What if instead of dreading the unknown, we focus on the anticipation? What if instead of worrying about failure or making mistakes, we look forward to learning and an opportunity to grow?

Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven” (NKJV).

There are times for change, and each season brings its own challenges and blessings. Let’s re-train our thinking to forecast joy instead of pain and abundance instead of scarcity.

#3: Remember Tomorrow’s Change Becomes Today’s Comfort Zone

Stop and think about that statement. The event or situation today that has us on pins and needles might very well be our new comfort zone in a few months or even a few weeks. That new job won’t be new forever, and we’ll be the seasoned employee and not the new hire before too long.

Through all of life’s changes, we can fix our eyes on the One constant that never changes: Jesus Christ, “the same yesterday, today, and forever” (Hebrews 13:8 NKJV). Whether change makes us want to laugh or cry, if we’re God’s children, we have the assurance that He will always be with us (Hebrews 13:5).

What change are you facing that has you on edge? How might a change of perspective help you embrace it instead of lose sleep?

~ Kristen

I’m grateful that this post first appeared on DailyPS.com.

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My Parting Thank-You to Singleness

In a few short weeks, I’m donning the white dress in my closet and crossing the threshold from singleness into a life-long marriage commitment. Entering this covenant will be the most important decision I’ve made apart from my salvation, and I’m praying for courage and wisdom to honor it well.

I realize if you’re currently single, you might be snickering right now. Why do you need courage? I’d sprint down that aisle if I had the chance! Hear me out, friends. Although I’m beyond excited for this new adventure in my life, I’m also convinced marriage is going to require as much, and probably more, sacrifice than singleness. That brings me to my first “thank-you” to my time as a single:

I thank my single years for teaching me to practice sacrifice.

As my single friends know, singleness has its fair share of sacrifice. Christian singles may have to die daily to their desires and submit them to the obedience of Christ. They often choose to give of themselves when they so much desire for someone to invest in them. And while life isn’t always lonely, it sometimes is. Even well-meaning friends don’t seem to understand the struggles they face.

Just because I’m saying ‘I do’ doesn’t mean these sacrifices and struggles are going away. They’re just going to change. For example, I will have to submit to my husband’s headship. Even though I’m so happy right now I can’t imagine this responsibility being a challenge, I’ve observed enough marriages to know that conflicts will come. I’ll have to sacrifice what I want for our marriage’s good. On a daily basis, I’ll need to die to my selfish desires to love James, my future husband, well.

Whether single or married, we are to be “imitators of God” (Ephesians 5:1 NKJV) and model our lives after Christ who “gave Himself” for the church, His bride (Ephesians 5:25). Our relationship status doesn’t change the command to live sacrificially. It just provides different circumstances in which we are to exercise it.

I thank my single years for showing me that my identity is found in Jesus Christ, not circumstances or a relationship.

When I was single, I often felt as though I had to prove myself in my career, writing, and service. While I certainly believe my single years gave me the opportunity to cultivate my God-given abilities, I had to learn that my identity isn’t found in anything I do or anything I have.

Regardless of my relationship status, my identity is in Christ alone. I’m God’s daughter first and always will be. Once married, I’ll still be God’s daughter and then James’s wife. And even if there are days I feel like a failure, I can take comfort knowing God is still my Father, Savior, and Sustainer. He’s faithful and will remind me that even when I fail or make mistakes, I am still His. I’m so glad to serve a God who gives second chances! Single or married, we all need them.

I thank my single years for teaching me to depend on God and establish a deepening relationship with Him.

My single years often drove me to my knees and to search the Scriptures for God’s promises. Many years, God seemed strangely silent, but I had to learn His timing is better than mine. His plans far surpass my stubborn expectations.

My walk with God has had its share of bumps and detours, but along the way, I’ve learned I can trust Him. I need time with Him each day just as I need air to breathe. My relationship with God has plenty of room for growth, and I’m excited about that. As I begin my marriage, I know I can depend on Him, even when hard times come, because He is always faithful.

He who calls you is faithful, who also will do it. (I Thessalonians 5:24 NKJV)

Whether God has called us to be single or married right now, His faithfulness remains the same.

I could add more to this gratitude list, and perhaps you could too. If you’re still single, waiting, or searching, please know this bride-to-be is cheering for you. My prayer is that you would not only find a godly spouse, if that is your desire, but also make the most of your single years. One day, you just might thank them.

~ Kristen

I’m grateful to DailyPS.com for hosting this post on their site. For more encouraging and inspirational posts, visit DailyPS.com.

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How to Beat Burn-Out this Summer

Have you ever wished that summer break were mandatory for everyone? I certainly have, but wishful thinking gets us nowhere. However, those of us who work year round can still find ways to beat burn-out.

Clear the calendar

This item is the hardest for me. No matter how much I try, my weekly calendar (not counting work obligations) looks like ink exploded all over it.

The only tip that seems to work is scheduling mandatory “do-not-disturb” time. If someone asks for that time, we can respond, “Sorry, but my calendar is booked.”

It’s not a lie. We’ve set aside intentional time for ourselves (and our families), and honestly, that’s a very good thing.

To read the full post, visit DailyPS.com. I look forward to your comments!

~ Kristen

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2 Lies the Enemy Tells Us about Being Single

This week’s post talked about God’s timing, and I think it’s “timely” that my guest post for DailyPS.com on singleness also published the same week. In every season of life, most of us would probably admit we’re “waiting” for something … to get through that advanced math class, to hear back on college applications, or to receive that long-awaited promotion.

Many people are also waiting and wondering when their relationship status might change. Though I don’t often blog about singleness, I think this topic is important, because it’s often misunderstood. If you’re single or know someone who is, I’d encourage you to click over to DailyPS.com to read the full post.

Regardless of your “status” or the item on your “waiting” list, the bottom line is this: Live abundantly where God has you today.

Post excerpt

Often, we single adults don’t stress about our relationship status until someone suggests we should. Not long ago, my church’s youth pastor shared from the pulpit how he met his wife online. The woman in front of me twisted in her seat and raked me over with a look that said, “Sweetheart, what are you waiting for?”

Well-meaning though she was, she doesn’t know my story. Well-meaning though people may be, they don’t know yours. Whether through not-so-subtle suggestions or other prickly tactics, Satan can make us question our confidence in Christ.

To deflect his darts, we should consider Paul’s challenge to the Ephesians, equipping ourselves “to stand against the wiles of the devil” (Ephesians 6:11 NKJV). Dictionary.com defines wiles as “a trick, artifice, or stratagem meant to fool, trap, or entice.”

In other words, wiles are lies that parade as truth, and perhaps we’ve entertained a few before. Something’s wrong with you. You’re not good enough. You missed the bus.

When lies rear their heads like ugly dragons, the only way to slay them is with truth. Hebrews 4:12 says that God’s Word “is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword” (NKJV). It’s the weapon we need to defeat the doubt and live the abundant life God’s planned for us (John 10:10).

Click here to read the full post.